Going on a blind date
Will your date with fate be a feast for the heart or a recipe for disaster? Some advice about going on a blind date - by Clive West
Maybe you've arranged to meet as a result of an advert in the personals or, more likely, a close friend has decided that you have been alone too long and it's time you met someone. Either way, you are about to undertake one of the most intimidating experiences you will ever go through. On the other hand, it can be very rewarding and exhilarating even if it proves to be unsuccessful.The first thing you need to decide upon is that you are going to try to enjoy yourself whatever happens. If nothing else, the blind date could be amusing, it will certainly sharpen up your social skills (with regard to potential partners) and, well, you never know ... Keep an open mind.
Here is some simple advice for going on a blind date.
Safety first
As with all new dates, make sure someone knows where you are going, you arrange to meet and stay in a relatively popular mixed gender location and you check in during the date and at the end. If the person you are meeting is worth knowing, they will not be offended and should come away with the impression that you are a sensible and respectable person.Don't expect too much from a blind date
You'll probably both be nervous and feeling clumsy. This is not a recipe for an immediate blisteringly passionate romance. If you both come away thinking that it was a very pleasant experience that would be well worth repeating, then the blind date was a definite success. Next time, and there should be a next time, it will be much better.Keep the blind date a manageable duration
Maybe the date will be a complete disaster and you can't wait to get away from one another. In that case, drinks followed by a slow and expensive dinner followed by a night on the town will seem like interminable torture. Far better to arrange to have a lunchtime bite together and then the session will be limited by both of your needs to return to your jobs. If you are going to hit it off, you should have a good idea in the time it takes to eat a sandwich and drink a cup of coffee.Have confidence
You are yourself and no-one else. Don't put on an act as a) you won't carry it off and b) sooner or later the other person will get to see the real you. It is always better that they begin by liking you than end up by despising you because you aren't the person they thought you were.Be independent
Make it clear from the outset that you are 'Going Dutch'. The last thing you need is (if you are a female) to feel that you owe the date something or (if you are a man) to take on a girl who expects you to pick up all the tabs. If the other party resists this idea then you should call off the date.Treat the blind date a bit like an interview
Have some questions in your mind about hobbies and interests and let the other person talk. Discussing such things are neutral (compared to conversations about current and former relationships) but highly informative. Do you have any common ground? A person's interests speak volumes about the type of character you have met.Ending the date
Well, if you have chosen an end-stopped date such as a weekday lunch together, then there will be no embarrassment over saying, 'I've got to go now'. What do you say other than that, though? This is a big topic and we will be covering it in another section of our dating tips.Finally, look out for 'weirdness' or undesirable character traits. For example, notice well if he or she:
- Discusses previous relationships ad nauseam
- Badmouths family and friends
- Shows off and draws attention to you both
- Swears and curses excessively
- Seems more interested in other diners
- Displays dubious personal hygiene or other strange habits
- Either throws money around or is loathe to part with it
- Is late or has to leave early and fails to adequately apologise
- Brags about career or previous experiences
- Is taciturn and monosyllabic
- Feels that it is your job to persuade them to go out with you
- Seems non-committal about their interest in you
Author : Clive West (Always the write decision)